"Lexophile" is a word used to describe those that have a love for words, such as "you can tune a piano, but you can't tuna fish", or "to write with a broken pencil is pointless." A competition to see who can come up with the best Lexophiles is held every year in an undisclosed location. This year's winning submissions: 


... When fish are in schools, they sometimes take debate.   

... A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months. 

... When the smog lifts in Los Angeles U.C.L.A.    

... The batteries were given out free of charge.  

... A dentist and a manicurist married. They fought tooth and nail.  

... A will is a dead giveaway.   

... With her marriage, she got a new name and a dress.   

... A boiled egg is hard to beat.   

... When you've seen one shopping center you've seen a mall.   

... Police were summoned to a daycare center where a three-year-old was resisting a rest. 

... Did you hear about the fellow whose entire left side was cut off?   He's all right now.   

... A bicycle can't stand alone; it's just two tired.     

... When a clock is hungry it goes back four seconds.     

... The guy who fell onto an upholstery machine is now fully recovered.  

... He had a photographic memory which was never developed.     

... When she saw her first strands of grey hair she thought she'd dye.   

... Acupuncture is a jab well done. That's the point of it.    


And finally:


.. Those who get too big for their pants will be totally exposed in the end.



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