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Volume I
January 28, 2003


Software Problems

Dear Tech Support:
         Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a slow down in the overall performance, particularly in the flower and jewelry applications that had operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.
         In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5, but installed undesirable programs such as NFL 5.0 and NBA 3.0.
         Now Attention 8.0 no longer runs and Conversation 2.6 simply crashes the system. I've tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.
         What can I do?

Desperate




Dear Desperate:
         First keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an entertainment package, while Husband 1.0 is an operating system. Try to enter the command: C:/I THOUGHT YOU LOVED ME and download Tears 6.2 to install Guilt 3.0. If all works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5.
         But remember, overuse can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0, or Beer 6.1.
         Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will create Snoring Loudly WAV files. Whatever you do, DO NOT install Mother-in-law 1.0 or reinstall another Boyfriend program. These are not supported applications and will crash Husband 1.0.
         In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have a limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and performance.
         I personally recommend Hot Food 3.0 and 7.7.

                  Good Luck,


                  Tech Support


--THE RECIPE BOX--
Tortilla Soup

--TABLE TALK--
The Substance Within the Loaf
Tips and Techniques of the Home Baker
Bread Making References
Spicing Up Breads

--KITCHEN REMEDY--
Refresh Stale Bread
Freeze Your Own Dough
Troubleshooting Bread

--JEST FOR FUN--
Pillsbury Doughboy Obituary
Software Problems
Actual Signs across the USA
Teachers

--FAMILY FUN-TIME IDEA--
DOUGH-ionary

--COOK'N TIP--
Unit Abbreviations




--NOTES FROM FOLKS--
Missing Ingredient
Missing Recipe


--COOKIE CRUMBS--
Falling for ...Dessert!



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